Then you meet in person and are devastated to discover that not only is there no chemistry, they have horrible taste in shoes. There‘s exhilaration, there‘s despair, and there's everything in between. They also aren’t worth getting worked about because they will change.On the other hand, it’s equally easy to get caught up in all the things that went wrong on previous dates and in previous relationships. In fact, even when you’re in a relationship, feelings are transitory. "Romance reminds me of a quote by screenwriter William Goldman: “Nobody knows anything.”Might as well get used to it.4 - Actions have consequences Dating is cruel, but fair.Rather, he was trying to make himself feel good, or happy--or, at least, to minimize his own pain or discomfort as much as possible. ME: I went to this dinner the other week where the host flat-out ignored me—he didn't even bother to get my name, or re-fill my drink glass—because he was so busy drooling over my admittedly gorgeous friend!Which is kind of a long way of saying: Don't take it personally. I don't think I've ever been that blatantly de-valued before.
Falling (and Staying) in Love—and Beyond When you offer your love to a partner, at first it’s very exploratory. You want to know more about their past, their family, and their odd little habits.
And I told myself, "Hey, it's no big deal; she was looking for something she'll never be able to find in me."In your situation, Maura, the dinner host's mind was not on the present.
It was on what he might be able to get in the future. The truth is, you are not nearly as alone as you think you are.
This post simply attempts to fit dating into a Zen and Buddhist lifestyle paradigm and give over some lessons I’ve learned over time. I wrote it so that I don’t forget the lessons I’ve learned. You should always only apply what does resonate with you.
These ideas are made to fit my own life and might not fit with yours.