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We left brunch and started walking to a place down the street when things took a turn for the What The Actual Fuck. " texts from my friends had started rolling in so I recommended that we start heading back, as pleasant as this experience had been.

That's the face of a woman who's seen her future and knows it involves slapping.

Neil: Me, my loving wife, and our three loving children!

glasses of champagne had inevitably given me a boost of confidence as well as a dire need to haul ass to the ladies', so I took the long route around to walk by this group and examine the prospects.

There were five of them: Bradley Cooper, Stretch Armstrong, Sasquatch, Not My Type, and Gavin.

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